My lovely wife and daughter came back Sunday night after being at Abuelita’s the better part of a week.
Sunday was also her 31st birthday. Isaac went with me to pick up her birthday present and made me laugh. The gift was a hit and as is my every so often I brought her flowers yesterday. One attorney from the office swears I am having an affair.  Don’t worry it isn’t her boss.
I just shake my head. We were talking about affairs and the people that have them the other day and then thinking about what type a person you generally have an affair with. See we recently had a rash of breakups amongst us. Some per Affair and some per Um now is better than affair later with kids and single parent-dom.  It has me thinking if I were to have an unfaithful disloyal bone in my body (not a pun). What type of person would she be? So I made a list of what I am looking for. So here goes. Um well first I’d pretty much want her to be awesome for it to be worth it. She’d have to love Jade. She’d have to like my Mom and Dad and if she was friends with my sister that would be cool too. And Spanish, that would be a big plus. She has to let me be myself. I have a balance now so yeah I’ll still need that, so someone with a level head to keep me from spending all my money on Propane and propane accessories’. And she’d have to be pretty astounding on like six or seven different levels that I can’t really discuss in mixed company. I’d also like her to be about 5’3ish and sorry blondes I am into Brownies so um yeah… looks like id choose one pretty much just like I already have. So I’ll save myself the trouble of bothering to go there and do that and catch that!
It is sad when a guy can’t be in love and show it for fear of being accused of unfaithfulness.  I say buy her flowers and treat her like you treat your momma if you treat your momma nice.
Sop up all this love slobber with this video!