every year we take a vacation of some sort. every year it takes me a few days to decompress from my normally pretty hectic lifestyle. I can’t just flip a switch and suddenly be in “relax” mode. Remembering back on it now, LaMex was freaking out the first time we vacationed together. I was horrible, setting the temperature to as cold as it will go in the hotel so we get our moneys worth. Wanting to make sure we were up for the free continental breakfast. Back and forth pacing until we could get down to the beach and relax. Then stand there with my fists on my hips looking at the lapping waves as if they were supposed to do something other than just lap. Completely unrelaxed.

This year we are trying something completely different. She and my sister went on vacation 6 months ago and My brother and I are going now. We are vacationing separately. problem is -and i knew this would happen- her vacation was so long ago she feels like she needs another and she is pregnant so of course she deserves it. I usually go for the amenities and shopping a plenty and most importantly a Beach. You know, bad food and good drinks with little para sails in them (Barbie umbrellas-tell me i am not ready to have a girl and I’ll keep proving you wrong, see!). But Josh and I are venturing into the woods and water. I am honestly so scared right now I had trouble going to sleep last night. Probably a diagnosable condition i could get a prescription for, but have a situation and i will think of the absolute worst possible out come in my head. Day Dreaming but not in a “whadda day for a day dream” tweedle Edee, the daydream boy kind of way where everyting turns out to be seen through a rose colored lense and at some point includes a hot girl, sex, a car and food that makes you wanna use the strectch mark oil to keep your belly stretching. No no more sinister; the car crashes the girl dies the sex yeah, not a chance, the food is poisoned and you are forced to eat it. Every thing is bad and horriable. I am growing out of my optimism basically and realizing that the world really is a mean old place. SO, i am scared as poop to go to the woods with my brother. the one point of light, Josh will be there. my best est bud. he is fearless he is driven and he will probably have to spend the first couple of days decompressing too.

So am writing this as a out of office message to all you my faithful readers commenter’s and lurkers alike. I’ll be out for the next week. Pacing back and forth up and down the bank chanting to my self relax relax relax.